It's been a really long time since I published here; I had forgotten how much my past self published on the world wide web. Reading through some of my old posts, I find some interesting pieces of memory, and marvel at how it conflicts with my current memories of those time periods. A lot of my earliest posts carried a deep sense of isolation, but I don't remember that isolation today as I must have experienced it back then. In my eyes today, teenage me was an awkward, innocent and sensitive soul, full of good intentions, harsh judgements, and lofty ideals. Present me doesn't agree with past me about everything I published, and I find much of it to be somewhat embarrassing, and endearing in an awkward way. Little me was trying to figure out the world, just in a manner a little more innocent than present me.
The world is a really complicated place, and I haven't figured it out yet. But, I'm thankful for the opportunity to try.
Since my last post, I worked in Alaska, my best friend from my childhood died, I got through a couple more years of college, I married a woman who is better than I deserved, I worked a sprinkler and backflow job, my wife and I had a beautiful little baby, I applied for my first real job (didn't get it, but that's okay), and my Dad died. It's been quite a journey.
I don't know if I'll get back to posting here soon. My suspicion is that it will be a long time. It is, however, nice to check in. I loved writing this blog.
If you're reading this, and you decide to go into the deep dark archives of my publications, I implore you to take my past self with a gentle humor. He was a good kid. Though it's a bit embarrassing for me, I'm not going to take anything down that he wrote, because I know it's a futile effort thanks to the Wayback Machine on the Internet Archive, and the other internet sites that will have taken screenshots of my blog. Like it or not, those things I published are out there forever. And, that's okay. It took a lot of time to become a better person than I used to be, and there were a lot of bumps along the road. This blog is a great evidence of that.
Next year will be a decade of blogging. Here's to a decade, friends.
