A Friend... Almost

Have you ever looked at the people who surround you who are your friends? They are those people with whom you share a deep understanding, and a deep love. People whom you trust with everything.
And then there are those people who are... Almost friends. On the outside, sure, you're friends. Everybody you associate with sees you as friends. But on the inside, you're not. You're more like close acquaintances. And it might not even be because you don't like that person and they don't like you. That is a viable option though. No, it might be that you just haven't experienced enough of life together with that person to call them a friend. Or maybe you were friends and something happened, and now you hold disdain for them. Or maybe it's not disdain, but uncertainty. Maybe you're not sure where you stand with that person, and it's too awkward to associate with them on a personal level. Maybe you're just scared. Scared because you are, or were, so close to being inseparable friends that it hurt, but there was just something indescribable dragging the friendship to a halt.

Maybe this is just me.

Maybe I'm alone in this.

I certainly feel that way.

But... Maybe I'm not alone. Maybe you feel that same sense of guilt or shame or longing - maybe even all three at once - when you see that person's picture. Or read their social media posts and statuses. Or recall old conversations shared with that person.
I don't know what else to say. At this point I'm out of words. I just wish I could figure out how to fix this problem - and I have to fix it. Because Jesus said love everyone. And it's hard. It's hard when you have a friend that was only... Almost.

Facing Giants - A Guest Post by Abby Lain

You know that moment, whether it is while being complimented or criticized, where you think to yourself, “If you only knew...”
We have all had that moment where that thought runs through our minds. That thought of, you have no clue how much blood, sweat, and tears it took to bring me here. You will never see the trials, the pain, and the world I had to go through to be able to stand in front of you, today. But guess what? I did it.
I may have walked only a mile, but it felt like thousands. I may have stood on solid ground, but it felt like fire. I could tell you that I have been to the dark side of the moon, but not even had left my house. Or was running through the depths of Hell, but was standing completely still.
If I told you these things, would you believe me? Would you believe the things I saw, or the things I did- or would you nod your head and roll your eyes? Would you take the time to listen, or would you cast it aside and say that I went through nothing?
No, to me it wasn't nothing.
To me, I had walked those miles, to me I had seen those things. To me I had stood in front of the devil himself and bowed my head in shame, as he laughed.
But to me, I had also overcome.
It might have taken days, months, or even years, but when I finally stood, I stood with power. I lifted my head at their scoffing faces and their pointing fingers, and I fought back. Not in the way I used to, not with darkness, but with a strand of light. And guess what? I won.

My friends, you are strong. I know that these things that you are going through, or have gone through, are not easy. I plead with you, down on my knees, to never give up.
To those of you who have won the battle, don't give up on the fight. And to those that aren't through the darkness yet, I promise you that things will become better. I can promise you that you are loved dearly, that even though you may feel alone in your battle, I can promise you that isn't the case. I can bear testimony to you that there is God in heaven that looks after you, that cares for you, and roots for you in your hardest times. I know He feels your pain, and even your joy. I know He laughs with you, cries with you, and even comforts you on your hardest day. I know that He will never forget you. Never.

My hope for you is that you will never forget this. You are destined for great things, and right now is just the beginning. Keep going, because after every storm is light.

Stay strong,
Abby




Bio:

Abby is just a girl with big dreams and a creative mind. She grew up writing stories with her friend, and eventually decided that she wanted to put her writing to use and started writing inspirational pieces. She is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and, God willing, hopes to someday serve a mission.
She also thinks that writing about herself in second person is a little weird, so she's going to stop, now. ;)

Human Rights

I'm tired of hearing people advocate for "Gay rights" or "Women's rights." I've really had enough of it.
But... What are rights, and where do they come from? Do people even know what they're fighting for?
Google says rights are, "A moral or legal entitlement to have or obtain something or to act in a certain way." Basically they are what a person is allowed to do. The freedoms which people have. 
So where do people go to get these rights? 
Well, the problem is that they go to the government. Everybody assumes that their rights come from the government these days. They fight for the right to be legally married as a gay couple, they fight for the right to smoke marijuana freely, they fight for the right to own guns. 
But they've been deceived. 
A person does not have to go to the government to obtain the right to be gay, or smoke weed, or own a gun. The only real power the government has is the power the people give it. If everybody in the United States stopped supporting the government today, there would be nothing the government could do. It would be helpless. By tomorrow it probably wouldn't even exist. So if a person was truly advocating for gun rights or gay rights, they wouldn't be trying to pass anti-discrimination laws or pro gun laws. They would be looking to restore the freedoms which they have given away, and to return the power to the people which has been stolen by the government. So is it not hypocritical when a person stands up and advocates to restore the rights of the people by implementing a new restriction...? Maybe I'm crazy, but that seems hypocritical to me.
No... Rights don't come from the government. They come from God. And God has given you the right to do anything you please. But seeing as God is the giver if rights, he is also the giver - and taker - of privileges. 
God gave us the right to commit adultery - but has told us that adultery will take our privilege of joy and peace of mind away. It may even lose our souls.
God gave us the right to kill - but killing others kills one's spirit, and quenches one's joy.
God gave us the right to do all wicked things. But each one comes with a price, in this life or the next.
So next time you hear a person advocating to the government for human rights, remember where rights come from. Remember that they are not from the government, but from God - and God has entrusted us to respect our rights, or lose them in the next life. 

I'm Going to be Vulnerable for a Moment

Right now, for a moment, on Saturday, December 21, 2013 at 11:37pm, I'm going to be vulnerable.

I'm going to open up, because there is something that I need to express.

I have a hard time accepting people. I have a hard time trusting people. I have a hard time loving people.

I am a lot shyer than I seem. I feel alone and afraid a lot. I do not feel accepted in many, many situations and places.

And it's hard. It's hard to overcome. Especially with people whom I respect greatly. I fear that I will become bothersome. That I am a nuisance, that I talk too much.

I wasn't always like this though. As a little child I wasn't. And then I grew, and I did things like interact with uncaring people and go to public school. And I changed.

In school I was told to sit down and shut up. To listen unconditionally to my teachers and to never speak out against them. I was told that asking questions is shameful, and that I would be looked down upon if I asked too many of them. I was told by my peers that there was a certain way to walk and to talk and to dress and to look, and that there were certain things that I had to like and do, and that if I didn't follow that way and like those things, I just simply couldn't fit in. 

And for a while, I was oblivious to all of it.

The first day I corrected a teacher and surpassed my reading goal by almost double yet again was the day that I started to see things. I started to see that many of the smiles were fake. And so were many of the greetings. And many of the friendships.

I saw the rolling eyes and the obvious sighs that I had missed before.

I saw the way that people turned ever so slightly away when I walked into the room, or tightened their circles just a little bit when I walked up.

I was different. 

And nobody liked it.

And I was so desperate to have a friend, just one friend that would pick me first for the playground football team or console me on a hard day, that I stopped being me. I stopped being that confident, brilliant child that I was and started being a quiet child that spent most of his time reading books and playing alone. Not the one that was always alone, I had the occasional friend, but none of them really stuck around. They either moved to another city, or another popularity ranking, or a new set of friends, and I was left alone again. 

There was a day... There was a day when I stood in the room that I'm writing from right now and contemplated how much it would actually hurt if I took the knife that I was holding and cut my throat. 

That was my low.

From that point I was taken to a councilor. His name was Sean. He made me feel important. Like I was a somebody. Like my opinion mattered and like my thoughts were valuable. He changed my life.

I still struggle. I worry that I talk too much. That people don't like me. That my opinions are too strong. That the smiles are still fake and the circles are still tightened, they've just gotten better at hiding it. 

I still worry that I am not accepted. 

Behind the confident, enthusiastic, radiant young man that I am today, I still fight a brutal battle in every moment to choose to be confident, and happy and enthusiastic. I fight a battle in choosing to trust and to love. I fight a battle in choosing to accept, and forgive.

Don't you?

Like Hyenas

Like hyenas they laugh at me.
They laugh because I'm different.
Because I don't go to public school. Because I don't laugh at the dirty jokes. Because I don't laugh at other people's faults.
They laugh at me because I practice harder than they do. Because I work harder than they do. Because I choose to not give in to mediocrity. Because I'm a gentleman. Because I'm kind and caring and polite and righteous, they laugh at me.
They laugh at me because I choose not to give in to the easy way. The way of darkness and sin.
And like hyenas, they travel in packs, or groups.
And I feel alone.
Those groups make me feel insecure. They make me feel secluded and like I don't fit in. They look like they're having fun, and make me feel like I'm not. Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn't be worth it to join them.
But then... I see them sometimes when they are alone. Then they don't look so happy. In fact, they look absolutely miserable. Because they have to look at the past and see the harm that they have done. The distraught faces and the broken spirits of the victims of their humor. Is that what I want? Do I want to look at my past and see only broken people and broken lives?
And yet, this is a style of living that can be more easily lived than any other time in the history of the Earth. If I wanted to, I never would have to be disconnected from my friends. I never would have to be alone. And even if I did manage to be alone, I would always have the latest game to keep me busy.
And yet... What happens when I lose my phone, or my laptop, or my tablet? What if it breaks? Or, somehow everything goes... Off. And it won't come back on. Where will I be then? What will happen to the fake reality that I live in? What will happen when my virtual pack of friends disappears? How will I be treated now that I am all alone, without my pack behind me?
I don't know the answers to these questions, but I do have theories. And they're not good things. They are lives spent in loneliness, despair, and regret.
So maybe it's not worth it after all.
It's not my choice though, it's up to you.
Are you willing to do the hard things, and persevere in right and truth?
Is it worth it?
I think so.

The Devil Came To Me

Not too long ago I wrote a post about compromise. In that post I talked some about the metaphor of a person standing on the mountain of their morality, and how the devil tries to get them to come down from that mountain. Well, the devil has come to me lately. He didn't come in the way that I would expect though. He came as a voice in my head. It started very small. It started as I watched America on her mountain top start to walk with the devil down the mountain, and that voice said, "Oh that stupid America. She'll never make it back up. She is lost forever." So I turned to the mountain of the politicians for help, and they looked idly on while America was led down. They didn't care. Many of them cheered the devil on. Once again the voice came, "Those politicians are evil men. They deserve all of the hate in the world for what they have allowed America to become. How disgusting." The pastors of America had left their mountain completely and were trying to push America back up to the top of hers. Nothing worked though. And again the voice came, "All is lost. There is no more hope for America. Freedom, justice, and truth have already died." By this time I was so angry. I was angry at America. I was angry at the politicians. I was angry at the people. I learned to hate them. Today though, I saw something new. From my mountain top, I looked up. I saw God. And he was weeping. But he was not weeping for the same reason that I was angry. He was weeping because he knew what he would have to do to restore the morality of America and the rest of the world, and it hurt him. Because what he would have to do would hurt them. His creations.
I still feel anger inside of me. But it is dwindling. I asked God to humble me and help me be rid of it, and he has for the most part, but I think he has left just a little bit for me to overcome myself. Be careful, my friends. The devil is a crafty being. If I had followed the path of anger and hatred, I might have done something that I would later regret under the pretense that I was fighting for freedom. And that would have ruined all good I might have done in the world.
Stay strong and may God bless you.
-Dallin

Because You Will Live to See Tomorrow

Much has been said of the question, "If you knew that you were to die tomorrow, what would you do today?" There are even songs about it. Songs like, Live Like You Were Dying by Tim McGraw. And while I think this is good and all, I think there is a better way of looking at life.
Because you will live to see tomorrow, what are you going to do today?
There is no challenge in living your last day to the fullest, because you have nothing to lose; you're on your last day. The challenge comes in learning to live every day to the fullest not because it could be your last, but simply because it's another day! Living every day to it's fullest because you will live tomorrow requires optimism and hope. It requires a purpose and a mission in life. It also requires strength and endurance. Being happy is hard, it really is. Even for me, and I'm naturally a very, very happy and optimistic person. There is just so much to be sad about. Think for a moment. America is dying. Morality and decency is dying. Common sense is dying. Go look at the news, they will tell you all about it. But what goodness and joy can we glean from the world? That's the hard part. In the moment that you learn to see and focus on the good things in the world all around you, you expand your potential in an infinite way. And that, that is when you learn that you really can make a difference in the world.
Now go find the good things.
Love,
Dallin

Compromise

Compromise is one of the great plagues in America today. It's everywhere. Principles are compromised, values are compromised, morals are compromised.

Now don't get me wrong, compromise can be a very good thing, but not when it's dealing with morality or principle. Here's the problem.

When you're compromising your morality, you're compromising with the devil. The devil does not compromise. He pretends to though. Let us imagine for a moment that there is a mountain, and that this mountain is your morality. You're standing on the very top of it refusing to go any lower, and the devil is at the bottom calling you, asking you to come down just a little and talk to him. You refuse, and so he does what the devil does. He comes up to you. Now in coming up to you he is not raising his moral standards. No, he is too evil to raise them at all. So him coming up to you is all a ruse conceived for the sole purpose of leading you down the mountain and away from your standards and morality. Now it might not be the devil himself that comes up to you. He might come by way of an ambassador in the form of a friend of yours whose morality has already been compromised. And this ambassador will come right up to almost the top of the mountain. We're talking withing feet, and inches if he's clever enough. And he will say so gently and innocently, "Hey friend, it must get lonely up there all by yourself. Why don't you come down just a little bit to here with me? No? Well hey, I came all the way up this mountain just to see you. The least you can do is come down a couple of feet to see me. Ok, look. I'll come up to within 2 inches of where you are, and at the same moment, I'll step up an inch, and you'll step down one. We'll be together for a while." And so it starts. The devil is a very patient being. If it takes him a lifetime, he will lead you one inch at a time down even a mountain the size of Everest. One compromised inch is never okay, because the devil's standard moves. He is not rooted in principle. So when he tells you that he's okay, and a nice guy, and has come all this way up so he must be a good guy, know that he's lying. As soon as you step down, he will step down as well and invite you to join him once again. And if you move up, he will follow you. He's relentless.

The same applies to America's government. Those fighting for freedom were once so strong. They stood on the top never moving. Then they started to give things away, and started to move down the mountain of freedom, liberty, and justice. Things like the right to work were given away by way of labor laws. Then came educational reform, the government funded schools, government owned land, and the growing control of the people by the government. And then welfare, gun control, and anti discrimination laws along with new regulations, requirements, and taxes. And those ambassadors of the devil just keep moving down. They might not even know that they are ambassadors of the devil, that's how clever he is. But anyone, Republican or Democrat, who gives away the freedoms of the American people is working for the devil, because captivity is a thing of the devil. And so when people like Mr. Obama complain about Republicans such as Ted Cruz, Mike Lee, and Rand Paul not compromising, they're wrong. The freedom fighters and their predecessors have compromised already. Almost to the point of total loss of American freedom. 

Please, America. No more compromise. Stand firm on your principles and never move. Because any more compromised morals or freedoms could result in the loss of your freedoms, and your soul.

Be strong, my friends.

-Dallin

What I Learned From Dumb and Dumber

So I watched Dumb and Dumber for the first time today. I hope it was the last time.
The title of this article is misleading. I didn't learn anything from that movie. Absolutely nothing. The whole point of the story dies in the end. The guy doesn't get the girl, the briefcase full of money that they were trying the whole movie to return gets spent without the owner's consent, and they end going right back to where they started. There is no character development, nothing worth seeing. I mean, there were a couple of really, really funny parts. I'll give the movie that much. But not enough to be worth watching. Here are the opening and closing scenes for those wondering exactly how dumb this movie is. (As a side note, there is content of questionable moral character in this movie as well as it being just plain dumb.)

I stood up from watching this movie having gained nothing and having wasted two hours of my life. It was a terrible feeling. My friend, do yourself a favor. Don't waste a piece of your life with this movie. There are much, much better things to do. Anyways, I guess I did learn one thing from all of this. I learned that the human soul does not like to waste time on frivolous things. I learned that it desires to learn and grow and improve, and time wasted on things such as this movie dampen it's joy. Maybe that's just my soul, but at any rate, I at least learned something about me. :)
Have a good life, my friends.
Go be awesome.

The Abstraction of Marriage

This video makes me so sad.

It is sad to me that these kids don't see what is happening here. It is even sadder to me that their parents haven't taught them what is happening. The whole gay marriage battle... It's not really about people wanting to be legally bound as gay couples. That's just what is seen on the surface. There were civil unions for those who wished to be legally bound gay couples. The true battle here is the abstraction of marriage. Because once marriage is an abstract concept, what is the significance of it any more? It becomes meaningless. All the sacredness that marriage once held... It would be lost. The abstraction of marriage would make it okay for a man and an animal to be married too, using the basis of, "Whatever makes them happy" that is so often used to support gay marriage. Marriage is a bonding covenant between a man and a woman. Civil Union is the proper term for that covenant between members of the same sex. Oh my friends, please do not allow this abstraction of marriage to take place. Please love gay people, do not hate them. Help them realize that they have a special union all for themselves. They do not need the word marriage to describe their relationships. And if they don't like the name of their type of union, then let them vote to change the name; but marriage, marriage is something different entirely. Please do not be fooled into thinking otherwise.

If You Don't Look for Something, You're Probably not Going to Find It

I sometimes look at pictures of the stars and of other things and think, "Why aren't the stars ever that clear to me?" and "Why don't I ever see things like that?"
Today as I was looking at some spectacular pictures of the stars, I figured it out.

I never really looked. I've seen the stars thousands of times, but I can count on my hands the number of times that I've actually looked at them. In my rush to live life, I've missed it. Because life is all about the little things, and I'm missing a lot of them. So maybe I need to slow down a little, and take more time to look at, rather than just see the world around me. Because that is how life is lived at it's greatest, and I want to live a great life.